Maybe I'm back

Hello,
It's been a while, but nobody really reads this anyway. I'm watching football, not doing homework. Feeling lazy. Not so bad since I don't have class until 1 tomorrow. That is all, maybe something more in the next few days.
Tyler

Global Warming and Texas

So I’m on spring break down here in Nebraska and it is really warm. Weird global warming warm. I can’t say that it’s such a bad thing. I don’t really like the cold nor do I like the heat. I would rather have it be just perfect, but I know that that is asking for a lot. We should probably just watch out for it. I mean maybe not my kids will find a problem with it, buy probably my kids’ kids will. We should stop sucking so much on the environment.

Another thing that I’m deathly scared of is Texas. Well, not actually of Texas, but of people who own guns in Texas. I’m headed down there on Tuesday and I’m bulletproofing my car windows. I’m sure there are many good people from Texas; I mean I’ve probably met at least three people from there and they seem fine. I’m just saying the second most powerful man in the States can just shoot a guy and get away with it. It seems all a little fishy to me, but I guess only in Texas. I think I’ll be fine, but God knows I won’t be down there for more than three days.

If anybody is into extreme indie music then you should listen to Broken Social Scene. Super indie, super cool. This is the band that you say you like when you’re at the bar and you are having an intellectual music conversation, but you don’t really know what you’re talking about. For reference, these guys are way cooler than Death Cab.

ps this was supposed to posted awhile ago, but I couldn't figure it out. Now I have. I've actually been to TX and come back. More on this later.

The Social Appearance of a Tool with Exceptions

I’ve wanted to write this for a long time. There are way too many “tools” around to deal with. I’ve about had enough. I think you probably have too, but you may not know exactly what you’re looking for. Here are is the social appearance of a tool, with the added exceptions to distinguish from pseudo-tool habits.

Aspect: Big diamond earrings in both ears and sometimes have their cartilage pierced. They think it’s cool because they’ve seen it on TV before. These earrings mostly likely stick out like headlights on a deserted highway.
Exception: The diamonds are real.

Aspect: They where a hemp bracelet. This is to show off how much they like pot, when in actuality, they don’t own any paraphernalia. Duh, real druggies don’t where their drugs on the wrists, they smoke them.
Exception: They grew the bracelet in their closet.

Aspect: They wear a collared shirt in a way that the collar draws attention. Not cool. I can see that you bought your shirt in Abercrombie; good job now put your collar down.
Exception: They’re from the East Coast and play professional golf.

Aspect: A trucker hat with a beer logo is permanently placed on their head. Awesome, you drink beer. Someone should tell you that it’s Tuesday morning, not beer time.
Exception: They have a beer in their hand. Natural section should take care of everything from here.

Aspect: Bad facial Hair. If you can’t grow a beard then don’t try. It looks terrible. Especially when it is no wider than an inch from neck to lip. Either keep all of it or get rid of all of it. Shaving your lack of facial hair into something that you think will define it does not help at all.
Exception: You just got back from a three week camping trip.

Aspect: Ripped Jeans. Why on earth would someone pay for jeans that are ripped? It doesn’t make you look any cooler. And since you’re wearing pants, you probably live somewhere cold. You don’t want holes.
Exception: The holes came from wear.

Aspect: You have more friends on facebook than you could actually have in real life. Please pull yourself away from your computer for two minutes and talk to a real person. Thank you.
Exception: NO EXCEPTION.

Aspect: You have a tribal band tattoo. What are you going to tell your kids? You have absolutely no idea what it means. Because it looks cool is not a good reason to get a tattoo. You’re stupid.
Exception: They’re actually in a tribe.

Aspect: They “socially” listen to Phish. This one hits home hardest with me. Somebody just wants to be cool, but they have to go and say they like Phish. Just admit it, you’ve never listened to something that wasn’t on the radio but that’s okay neither has my 13 year old sister. As soon as I ask what’s you’re favorite album, or how many times did you see them and you tell me you’re seeing them next summer, you’re done. I may never speak another word to you on principle.
Exception: They were in a Phish lot ready to go to the show. (Would have only worked a couple of years ago, at this point there is really no exception)

I know there are more out there, so if you guys want to add a comment on you favorite aspects of a tool please do so. And for those of you who are tools, there’s still hope, just try to wean off of these aspects slowly. It won’t hurt too much.

Alright Charlie, This is for you...

So I had a blog last semester when I was in Tokyo. It was cool and a bunch of people read it. A bunch of people like my parents, aunts and people who generally wanted a PG version of Japan. Well, the problem was that I was in college. College is not PG. Most of the time it’s closer to PG-13 or R, with the R rating coming from say a sex-comedy, not coming from a “Boogie Nights” R or even a “Matrix” R. College has essentially become dirty word play, especially in a country where everyone understands everyone else. The R rating is also derived from say Tom Cruise’s “Cocktail” seeing how we have gained an almost never ending freedom and where beer has become the second or third food group in most of our diets. But enough of this.

Prepare yourselves, because here in the next few sentences will be something vague and insightful. Re-entry has been really strange. You see people around and you aren’t sure what to think of them and they are definitely not sure what to think of you. For most of the people that I have seen since I’ve been back, I might have well been a recluse on campus last semester. It’s just strange. I’m meeting all sorts of new people and find that there were a lot of people that I would consider my friends last semester that are now simply acquaintances. Like the equivalent of a facebook friend. Yeah, I’m morally opposed to facebook, but that will be for another time.

So since I’ve been back, I needed to reacquaint myself with American culture. Nothing says American culture like Cowboys. Gay Cowboys that is. Over the weekend I was able to go see “Brokeback Mountain” and was I impressed. The film was gut wrenching. Every twist and turn within the plot was perfectly placed and there wasn’t one bit of bad acting. We decided that the film was emotionally draining. Like listening to a Damien Rice record about 4 or 5 times in a row. The characters are captivating the cinematography was gorgeous and I don’t know if I can really watch a movie like that again very soon. It was one of the best movies that I have seen in a long time. It just tears you apart.

So here it is my new blog. I have absolutely no idea how often I will write in it, how funny or not funny it will be or even how appropriate it will be. I will say that anyone who reads this should pass it along to the right parties. I would love for my parents not to read this for at least a month. Until next time.